"hi. ate us" some pizza tonight.

i had some people over tonight, we had pizza, it was good. fun times. anyhow, i think i'm done with this blog account for awhile, maybe a sporadic post here and there, but with quite a bit less frequently. not many people read it anyhow, and now I have a more personal, behind the scenes, emotive, revealing, private blog that I write in everyday and is there just for me and nobody else.

sporadic kisses to you all.

hard title for me to come up with.

i want to talk politics, but alas, i shall refrain. I have written more papers for people since I've been out of school than when I was in school... it's an odd phenomenon... but if people want to pay for my talents, so be it :)

i thought this essay on sexual innuendo was pretty funny and intriguing, give it a hard look and really penetrate to the bottom so you come away completely satisfied ;)

Sexual Innuendo is a hard topic to stay on top of. As a humor tool, it stands erect in the English language. While there are no hard and fast rules as to what constitutes sexual innuendo, many people have mass-debated over the topic, and now the general principles at the root of the topic are firm and well-rounded. However, full penetration of the subject requires that the reader take a long, hard look at the target and be a cunning linguist in order to avoid limp phrases and imbibe the phrase with a large handful of meanings. The topic can become hot by attempting to grasp it, and the more one experiments with it, the more interested they become. Also, as the language changes innuendos must change in order to fill the newly created holes and satisfy listeners.

A common problem with sexual innuendo is the recipient being unable to wrap their hands around the intended meaning. In this case, an individual using sexual innuendo will often start slow and eventually build up, increasing depth more and more until the recipient feels the actual thrust of the point and the innuendo climaxes. An innuendo is always the most pleasing when no one sees it coming, often by entering the mind through the rear. Some skilled people are even able to use several sexual innuendos quickly in succession, resulting in multiple innuendo-esque climaxes. Key phrases can grasp the sentence by the ankles and part its long clauses allowing the orator to penetrate the essence of the sentence. In this regard, the key is to avoid stiff, rigid words, for ones that give the meaning of the sentence a firm rise in innuendic possibilities. Some regard sexual innuendo as an art form, and it goes without saying that one needs a certain level of oral skills in order for the fluidic exchange of innuendo to succeed. However, this is not enough to fill the requirements. One needs to pay special attention to the region of the sentence to which the innuendo will enter. For lasting effects, it is most important to enter deep within the recipient's consciousness and to ensure that all of the seeds of humor have flowed forth. This is not an easy task for most people, so it is only through rigorous repetition of the insertion of sexual innuendo that one can fully master the uplifting effects it can have on vocabulary.

On another side note, one must remember that when practicing innuendo to somebody who has heard it for the first time, one must be ready to slowly enter in the tight quarters of the reader's mind, lest risk getting their ideas unpleasantly stuck within the annals of the reader's mind.

Although sexual innuendo requires masterful manipulation of parts of speech (and sometimes the skillful use of body language), for most people it comes quickly.

well, that made me sleepy. i'm going to lay down on my firm pillow, swallow the days' troubles, and come tomorrow, I'll be feeling at the peak of the world.

kisses at the peak.

-lane

elections, erections, and the big "o+"

October 5th is the most common birthday in the us (consequently, that would put conception at new year's eve).

I read an obscure hypothesis that blood type correlates to personality. Legend has it that Type A is calm and trustworthy; Type B is creative and excitable; Type AB is thoughtful and emotional; and Type O is a confident leader.
O+ is the most common blood type at 37%
A+ is second with 34%

homosexual men have larger genitalia than heterosexual men on average.
men with more older brother's are more likely to be gay.

51 % of women prefer to have sex with the lights off
27% of men prefer to have sex with the lights off.

harry houdini died on halloween.

halloween was a lot of fun. Thanks Whit and Taylor...

a few key elections coming up... looks grim :( sad face.

if you haven't seen the show community, you should stop what you are doing right now (okay, when my blog is done), and go watch it on the hulu or something.

I miss playing baseball. sad. i want a mini cooper with the steering wheel on the other side.

venus vs mars by jay z is so good... and so is never knew you by cage. listen to them.

i'm not sleepy, but i should be. i'm going to try. ciao

good luck kisses to you all.

grazie

pretty girl... you know who you are... thanks for making me smile and having cute dimples and an infectious laugh and being smart and sweet and kind and such.

squeezit til it otter pops!

current things that make me happy:
politics. (ish).
girl situations.
maria mena's music.
squeezits and otter pops
prince (always)... that little shit :)
my family.
red robins 5 dollar veggie burger and fry deal
that i worked out today.
that I ate healthy today.
ambition/forward momentum
today, tomorrow, and yesterday (in that order)
hanging out with brittany a couple times in the last week
pea coat weather
seeing all my old friends at a halloween party the other day.
serendipity
bean and cheese burritos
clean sheets
grape powerade
hooded sweatshirts
the changing of the leaves
sleeping with ear plugs
the show white collar
secrets
eternal sunshine of the spotless mind
npr wait! wait! don't tell me!
quotes. a lot of new favorite ones from this awesome book.
fake steak sandwiches
winco
shadow puppets
neurolinguisticprogramming

oh snapple. let there be light..

first ten snapple facts.

#1 A Goldfish’s attention span is three seconds.
#2 Animals that lay eggs don’t have belly buttons.
#3 Beavers can hold their breath for 45 minutes under water.
#4 Slugs have four noses.
#5 Camels have three eyelids.
#6 A honey bee can fly at 15mph.
#7 A queen bee can lay 800-1,500 eggs per day.
#8 A bee has five eyes.
#9 The average speed of a housefly is 4.5 mph.
#10 Mosquitoes are attracted to people who just ate bananas.

I used the light box for the first time today. I felt full of energy and happy actually, and now i'm sleepy. Placebo effect perhaps? Either way, I'm de"lighted" -- that pun was not even going to be intended. oh well... Should know how it goes after a couple weeks i imagine. i'm going to take ambien for the next two weeks or so i decided. about 2 o'clock. I'm going to try and end up sleeping 2am-9am everyday regardless. that's my goal. Columbus day. Can we end this sham? Who was taught in elementary that most people at the time thought the world was flat??? if you were, your teachers' were dumb. almost everyone believed the world was round. (which technically it isn't round... it's some other shape i don't remember... a something something spherical something or something... maybe i invented that. well a sentence with four somethings in it is at least good for something right?) Columbus was a douche. he didn't discover America, and I don't know why the hell that rumor continues to exist. He did make it possible for europeans to eventually come over here and rape, pillage and steal from the indians... so kudos to that. perhaps they should call it rape and pillage day. Has a nicer ring to it... and sounds like a more enjoyable holiday... at least for sex offenders and thieves... I don't know how or why i got started on this topic. forget that I did. Saturday, Angela Larson's party at 8. whit... remind me. you are the best at that <3 I need to remember to tell Andrew and Mario as well. i love the new 30 seconds to mars song. give it a listen. I go watch house, take ambien, go to sleep. in that order. wen wen

don't ask, I'll tell you this blog is a little gay...

first word that popped into my head, then the next, the next etc. I think it's funny, and very interesting to do this from time to time. so now, is apparently that time. odd yes, but i suggest everyone do it from time to time. it's interesting and sometimes insightful (perhaps not in this case).... any how. we'll start: myotonic goats. rubies. First Earth Batallion, Ron Hubbard, Cupboard, counter, insurgency, serotonin, glowstick, fourth of july, kiss, make up, mac, apple, granny smith, cancer, pisces, pica, ice, bottle cap, dr. pepper, mashed potatoes, jalapenos, Australian, kangaroo, rooster, coccyx, joint pain, sharks, poker, seven, kim, chi, feng shui, wind, clock, father, car, yellow, bee, sunflower, seed, secede, texas, alamo, car rental, porter, bellhop, shower, baby, birth, light, lucent, technology.

cook my pizza. but be careful, plastic melts.

Mario moved back to Salt Lake. three cheers. Vince and Katiana both have birthday parties Saturday. three jeers. I wish I could be two places at the same time. Symbicort starts to improve my lung function within 15 minutes. That's important to me. Ask your doctor if symbicort is right for you. I wish I took yaz and was hospitalized for blood clots, pulmonary embolism, stroke, or heart attack. I'd be rich...



Anyhow. I watched whip it the other day. I liked it. not fabulous. probably a 7 out of 10. I wanted to watch the new Ricky Gervais movie... but was persuaded otherwise by cucumber kim-chi. Two of my professors were on the news in the last couple days. Dr. Strayer for his research on cell phones/texting and driving (studies for which I was a lab assistant... go me). Then Mark Nielsen was on the news for creating an anatomy application for the Iphone. I pick good professors :)



Daniel Tosh and Mitch Fatel are two of my favorite comedians. Anyone who isn't too easily offended and hasn't seen them should definitely watch them. I'm watching the new Daniel Tosh special now... and it just cut to a girls gone wild commercial... seriously. what is wrong with these people? The hottest girl in America just might be from your town, your college, or the house next door. She might even be your best friend's sister!



clues you don't have self-esteem or dignity: you have plastic or collagen self-esteem, you show your breasts/vagina to complete strangers with video cameras.



Music I can't stop listening to at the moment: imogen heap "hide and seek," sounds of animals fighting "the heretic" slipknot "snuff" family force 5 "share it with me" the used "best of me" brand new " Afi "fainting spells" etc. etc.



cold weather is upon us. My wardrobe is now kick-ass. I'm excited. I need to meet people in the next six months while I'm at my cutest :p



alright now a commercial for Enzyte... they have a t-shirt I think. I want it! only if they have it in black though.



Daylight savings time is soon isn't it. Don't we get an extra hour? If so... doesn't that mean that technically October is the longest month of the year. That's kind of a cool fact I just realized :D



I think that's enough for now.



papa murphy's is fucking stupid.. seriously. just cook my fucking pizza. Why the hell would I want to cook it? I'm not an expert pizza maker, I'd rather have somebody else do it.



handshakes transfer more germs than kissing.

my greeting style must change to accommodate that.



need new black chucks.



ciao

snapple facts

#1 A Goldfish’s attention span is three seconds.
#2 Animals that lay eggs don’t have belly buttons.
#3 Beavers can hold their breath for 45 minutes under water.
#4 Slugs have four noses.
#5 Camels have three eyelids.
#6 A honey bee can fly at 15mph.
#7 A queen bee can lay 800-1,500 eggs per day.
#8 A bee has five eyes.
#9 The average speed of a housefly is 4.5 mph.
#10 Mosquitoes are attracted to people who just ate bananas.
#11 Flamingos are pink because they eat shrimp.
#12 Emus and kangaroos cannot walk backward.
#13 Cats have over 100 vocal chords.
#14 Camel’s milk does not curdle.
#15 All porcupines float in water.
#16 The world’s termites outweigh the world’s humans 10 to 1.
#17 A hummingbird weighs less then a penny.
#18 A jellyfish is 95% water.
#19 Children grow faster in the spring.
#20 Broccoli is the only vegetable that is also a flower.
#21 Almonds are part of the peach family.
#22 Alaska has the highest percentage of people who walk to work.
#23 The San Francisco cable cars are the only mobile national monument.
#24 The state of Maine has 62 lighthouses.
#25 The only food that does not spoil is honey.
#26 The Hawaiian alphabet only has 12 letters.
#27 A ball of glass will bounce higher then a ball of rubber.
#28 Chewing gum while peeling onions will prevent you from crying.
#29 On average a human will spend up to 2 weeks kissing in his/her lifetime.
#30 Fish have eyelids.
#31 The average human will eat an average of eight spiders while sleeping.
#32 There are one million ants to every human in the world.
#33 Termites eat through wood two times faster when listening to rock music!
#34 If you keep a goldfish in a dark room it will eventually turn white.
#35 Elephants only sleep two hours a day.
#36 A duck’s quack doesn’t echo.
#37 A snail breathes through its foot.
#38 Fish cough.
#39 An ant’s smell is stronger then a dog’s.
#40 It is possible to lead a cow up stairs but not down.
#41 Shrimp can only swim backward.
#42 Frogs cannot swallow with their eyes open.
#43 A cat’s lower jaw cannot move sideways.
#44 The bullfrog is the only animal that never sleeps.
#45 Elephants are capable of swimming 20 miles per day.
#46 Elephants are the only mammal that cannot jump.
#47 Giraffes have no vocal chords.
#48 Cats can hear ultrasound.
#49 Despite its hump … camels has a straight spine.
#50 Mosquitoes have 47 teeth.
#51 There are 63,360 inches in a mile.
#52 Eleven percent of people in the world are left-handed.
#53 The average women consumes six pounds of lipstick in her lifetime.
#54 The average smell weighs 760 nanograms.
#55 A human brain weighs about three pounds.
#56 A quarter of the bones in your body are in your feet.
#57 You blink over 10,000,000 times a year.
#58 A sneeze travels out of your nose at 100 mph.
#59 Brain waves can be used to power an electric train.
#60 The tongue is the fastest healing part of the body.
#61 Pigs get sunburned.
#62 The lifespan of a taste bud is 10 days.
#63 The average human produces 10,000 gallons of saliva in a lifetime.
#64 Strawberries contain more vitamin C then oranges.
#65 A one-day weather forecast requires about 10 billion math calculations.
#66 Americans, on average, eat 18 acres of pizza a day.
#67 There are 18 different animal shapes in the animal cracker zoo.
#68 The longest one syllable word is “screeched.”
#69 No word in the English language rhymes with month.
#70 A “jiffy” is actually 1/100 of a second.
#71 There is a town called “Big Ugly” in West Virginia.
#72 The average person uses 150 gallons of water per day for personal use.
#73 The average person spends two weeks of its life waiting for a traffic light to change.
#74 You share your birthday with nine million others in the world.
#75 The average person makes 1,140 phone calls per year.
#76 The average person spends two years on the phone in his/her lifetime.
#77 No piece of paper can be folded more then seven times.
#78 Alaska is the most eastern and western state in the U.S.
#79 There are 119 grooves on the edge of a quarter.
#80 About 18 percent of animal owners share their bed with their pet.
#81 Alaska has more caribou than people.
#82 August has the highest percentage of births.
#83 Googol is a number (1 followed by 100 zeros).
#84 Oysters can change genders back and forth.
#85 The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows.
#86 Until the 19th century, solid blocks of tea were used as money in Siberia.
#87 A mile on the ocean and a mile on land are not the same distance.
#88 A ten gallon hat holds less then one gallon of liquid.
#89 The average American walks 18,000 steps a day.
#90 The average raindrop falls at seven mph.
#91 There are more telephones than people in Washington, D.C.
#92 Fish can drown.
#93 A kangaroo can jump 30 feet.
#94 Lizards communicate by doing push-ups.
#95 Squids can have eyeballs the size of volleyballs.
#96 The average American will eat 35,000 cookies in his/her lifetime.
#97 A turkey can run at 20 mph.
#98 When the moon is directly over you, you weigh less.
#99 You burn 20 calories an hour chewing gum.
#100 In a year, the average person walks four miles making their bed.
#101 About half of all Americans are on a diet at any given time.
#102 A one-minute kiss burns 26 calories.
#103 Frowning burns more calories then smiling.
#104 There are more then 30,000 diets on public record.
#105 You will burn seven percent more calories walking on hard dirt then pavement.
#106 You weigh less at the top of a mountain then sea level.
#107 You burn more calories sleeping then watching TV.
#108 Licking a stamp burns 10 calories.
#109 Smelling apples and/or bananas can help you lose weight.
#110 Frogs never drink.
#111 Only male turkeys gobble.
#112 At birth, a Dalmatian is always pure white.
#113 The fastest recorded speed of a racehorse was over 43 mph.
#114 The oldest known animal was a tortoise, which lived to be 152 years old.
#115 Bamboo makes up 99 percent of a panda’s diet.
#116 The largest fish is the whale shark - it can be over 50 feet long and weigh two tons.
#117 The starfish is the only animal that can turn its stomach inside out.
#118 Honeybees are the only insects that create a form of food for humans.
#119 The hummingbird is the only bird that can fly backwards.
#120 The only continent without native reptiles or snakes is Antarctica.
#121 The only bird that can swim and not fly is a penguin.
#122 A duck can’t walk without bobbing its head.
#123 Beavers were once the size of bears.
#124 Seals sleep only one and a half minutes at a time.
#125 Pigeons have been trained by the U.S. Coast Guard to spot people lost at sea.
#126 A pigeon’s feathers are heavier than its bones.
#127 A hummingbird’s heart beats 1,400 times a minute.
#128 Dragonflies have six legs but can’t walk.
#129 Mosquitoes have 47 teeth.
#130 Koala and humans are the only animals with unique fingerprints.
#131 Penguins have an organ above their eyes that converts seawater to fresh water.
#132 A crocodile cannot move its tongue.
#133 Honeybees navigate by using the sun as a compass.
#134 An ant can lift 50 times its own weight.
#135 A single coffee tree produces only about a pound of coffee beans per year.
#136 Strawberries are the only fruits whose seeds grow on the outside.
#137 The city of Los Angeles has three times more automobiles than people.
#138 Hawaii is the only U.S. state that grows coffee.
#139 Hawaii is the only state with one school district.
#140 Holland is the only country with a national dog.
#141 The square dance is the official dance of the state of Washington.
#142 Hawaii is the only U.S. state never to report a temperature of zero degrees F or below.
#143 “Q” is the only letter in the alphabet not appearing in the name of any U.S. state.
#144 Texas is the only state that permits residents to cast absentee ballots from space.
#145 Lake Superior is the world’s largest lake.
#146 The smallest county in America is New York County, better known as Manhattan.
#147 Panama is the only place in the world where you can see the sun rise on the Pacific and set on the Atlantic.
#148 The tallest man was 8 ft. 11 in.
#149 Theodore Roosevelt was the only president who was blind in one eye.
#150 The first sport to be filmed was boxing in 1894.
#151 The fastest served ball in tennis was clocked at 154 mph in 1963.
#152 In 1985, the fastest bicyclist was clocked at 154 mph.
#153 The speed limit in NYC was eight mph in 1895.
#154 Americans spend more than $630 million a year on golf balls.
#155 In 1926, the first outdoor mini-golf courses were built on rooftops in NYC.
#156 Swimming pools in the U.S. contain enough water to cover San Francisco.
#157 The first TV soap opera debuted in 1946.
#158 The first MTV video was “Video Killed the Radio Star,” by the Buggles.
#159 The first TV show ever to be put into reruns was “The Lone Ranger.”
#160 One alternative title that had been considered for NBC’s hit “Friends” was “Insomnia Café.”
#161 The first TV network kids show in the U.S. was “Captain Kangaroo.”
#162 The temperature of the sun can reach up to 15 million degrees Fahrenheit.
#163 The first penny had the motto “Mind your own business.”
#164 The first vacuum was so large, it was brought to a house by horses.
#165 Panama is the only place in the world where you can see the sun rise.
#166 Before mercury, brandy was used to fill thermometers.
#167 You have to play ping-pong for 12 hours to lose one pound.
#168 One brow wrinkle is the result of 200,000 frowns.
#169 The first human-made object to break the sound barrier was a whip.
#170 In 1878, the first telephone book ever issued contained only 50 names.
#171 The most sensitive parts of the body are the mouth and the fingertips.
#172 The eye makes movements 50 times every second.
#173 Chinese is the most spoken language in the world.
#174 The world’s biggest pyramid is not in Egypt, but in Mexico.
#175 In 1634, tulip bulbs were a form of currency in Holland.
#176 The first bike was called a hobbyhorse.
#177 The first sailing boats were built in Egypt.
#178 The first ballpoint pens were sold in 1945 for $12.00.
#179 The first lighthouse to use electricity was the Statue of Liberty in 1886.
#180 The first VCR was made in 1956 and was the size of a piano.
#181 The first jukebox was located in San Francisco in 1899.
#182 A rainbow can only be seen in the morning or late afternoon.
#183 The Capitol building in Washington, D.C. has 365 steps to represent every day of the year.
#184 The most used letters in the English language are E, T, A, O, I and N.
#185 A male kangaroo is called a boomer.
#186 A female kangaroo is called a flyer.
#187 There are over 61,000 pizzerias in the U.S.
#188 Antarctica is the driest, coldest, windiest, and highest continent on earth.
#189 The Sahara Desert stretches farther than the distance from California to New York.
#190 Thailand means “Land of the Free.”
#191 Popcorn was invented by the American Indians.
#192 Jupiter spins so fast that there is a new sunrise nearly every 10 hours.
#193 The year that read the same upside down was 1961. That won’t happen again until 6009.
#194 You don’t have to be a lawyer to be a Supreme Court Justice.
#195 Eleven of the 50 states are named after an actual person.
#196 If you doubled one penny every day for 30 days, you would have $5,368,709.
#197 The first person crossed Niagara Falls by tightrope in 1859.
#198 The U.S. is the largest country names after an actual person (Amerigo Vespucci).
#199 The largest cheesecake ever made weighed 57,508 lbs.
#200 The first country to use postcards was Austria.
#206 Over 1 million earths would fit inside the sun.
#208 Add up opposing sides of a dice cue and you’ll always get seven.
#214 Giraffes can lick their own eyes.
#218 A jackrabbit can travel more than 12 feet in one hop.
#221 The game of basketball was first played using a soccer ball and two peach baskets.
#227 Tsiology is anything written about tea.
#228 There is a town in South Dakota named Tea.
#229 The Caspian Sea is actually a lake.
#232 The blue whale’s heart is the size of a small car.
#233 There are seven letters that look the same upside down as right side up.
#236 Cows give more milk when they listen to music.
#238 An ostrich’s brain is smaller than its eye.
#244 The watermelon seed-spitting world record is about 70 feet.
#251 There are more French restaurants in New York City than in Paris.
#257 The first food eaten in space by a U.S. astronaut was applesauce.
#258 Lemon wood is carved into chess pieces.
#262 The act of chewing an apple is a more efficient way to stay awake than caffeine.
#267 Double Dutch jump rope is considered a cross-training sport.
#268 One lemon tree will produce about 1,500 lemons a year.
#269 Horseback riding can improve your posture.
#270 Colors like red, yellow and orange make you hungry.
#272 At birth a human has 350 bones, but only 206 bones when full grown.
#273 Each year, the average American eats about 15 pounds of apples.
#275 It took the first man to walk around the world four years, three months and 16 days to complete his journey.
#278 China only has one time zone.
#292 Heavier, not bigger, lemons produce more juice.
#294 No only child has been a U.S. President.
#300 Pennsylvania is misspelled on the Liberty Bell.
#302 Ketchup was once sold as a medicine.
#312 A flea can jump 30,000 times without stopping.
#315 No two lip impressions are the same.
#326 On average, you’ll spend a year of your life looking for misplaced objects.
#336 The last letter to be added to our alphabet was J.
#346 The medical term for writer’s cramp is graphospasm.
#351 Cold water weighs less than hot water.
#354 Bamboo can grow three feet in one day.
#357 A baboon is a variety of lemon.
#358 Butterflies were formerly known by the name Flutterby.
#359 A teaspoon contains 120 drops of water.
#360 Mexican jumping beans jump to get out of sunlight.
#363 Pearls dissolve in vinegar.
#366 The center of some golf balls contain honey.
#370 Heat, not sunlight, ripens tomatoes.
#372 A housefly hums in the key of F.
#381 Baboons were once trained by Egyptians to wait on tables.
#383 Mount Katahdin in Maine is the first place in the U.S. to get sunlight each morning.
#390 Jack is the most common name in nursery rhymes.
#396 The dragonfly can reach speeds of up to 36 mph.
#399 Manhattan was the first capital of the United States.
#406 The deepest place in the ocean is about seven miles deep.
#408 Panda bears eat up to 16 hours a day.
#409 Approximately 16,500 people in the U.S. go by the last name Lemon.
#411 Lifejackets used to be filled with sunflower seeds for flotation.
#419 A jiffy is an actual time measurement equaling 1/100th of a second.
#422 Apples, peaches and raspberries are all members of the rose family.
#423 U.S. paper currency isn’t made of paper - it’s actually a blend of cotton and linen.
#424 The “ZIP” in the ZIP code stands for Zone Improvement Plan.
#425 Kangaroos can’t walk backwards.
#427 Lemons ripen after you pick them, but oranges do not.
#428 There are 118 ridges on the edge of a United States dime.
#429 There are 336 dimples on a regulation American golf ball.
#430 One acre of peanuts will make 30,000 peanut butter sandwiches.
#431 A twit is the technical term for a pregnant goldfish.
#436 Beavers have orange teeth.
#437 The woodpecker can hammer wood up to 16 times per second.
#438 Mount Everest rises a few millimeters every year.
#439 Snails can sleep for up to three years.
#440 The pupils in goats’ eyes are rectangular.
#442 Bees’ wings beat 11,400 times per minute.
#444 The Statue of Liberty wears a size 879 sandal.
#445 If there are two full moons in a month, the second one is called a “blue” moon.
#446 You breathe in about 13 pints of air every minute.
#447 A gallon of water weighs 8.34 pounds.
#448 The sun evaporates about a trillion tons of water a day.
#449 Sound travels quicker in water than in air.
#450 A group of cats is called a clowder.
#452 There are approximately 9,000 taste buds on your tongue.
#453 Raindrops can fall as fast as 20 miles per hour.
#454 Polar bear fur is transparent, not white.
#455 Lobsters can live up to 50 years.
#458 Fresh cranberries can be bounced like a rubber ball.
#463 The dot over the letter “I” is called a tittle.
#464 Cows do not have upper front teeth.
#469 454 U.S. dollar bills weigh exactly one pound.
#473 Antarctica has as much ice as the Atlantic Ocean has water.
#474 To temporarily revive your ballpoint pen, dip the tip into hot water for a few seconds.
#475 Wrapping rubber bands around the ends of hangers can prevent clothes from slipping off.
#476 Replacing your car’s air filter can improve gas mileage by 10 percent.
#477 A chalkboard eraser is one of the best ways to wipe a foggy windshield.
#478 Candles will burn longer and drip less if they are placed in the freezer a few hours before using.
#479 Knots come out easier if you sprinkle talcum powder on them.
#480 You can tell which day a loaf of bread was baked by the color of its plastic twist tag.
#484 Rinsing bacon under cold water before frying can reduce the amount it shrinks by almost 50 percent.
#485 Refrigerating apples can help them last up to 10 times longer than those left at room temperature.
#486 While chopping onions, hold a piece of bread between your lips to keep your eyes from watering.
#487 Place an apple in the bag with your potatoes to keep them from budding.
#488 Place a slice of bread in the storage container to keep cookies soft when storing.
#489 To keep an ice cream cone from dripping, stuff a miniature marshmallow into the bottom of the cone.
#490 To take lumps out of a bag of sugar, place it in the refrigerator for 24 hours.
#492 To remove crayon marks from walls, use a hairdryer to heat the wax.
#493 To make a zipper slide up and down more smoothly, rub a bar of soap over the teeth.
#494 Wipe the leaves of your plants with the soft inside of a banana skin to bring up shine and remove dust.
#496 To clean paint off your hands, use olive oil - it softens the paint and makes it easy to remove.
#497 To fix a button about to fall off, dab a little clear nail polish over the threads holding it on.
#651 Forty-six percent of leisure visitors to downtown New York City come from outside the United States.
#654 New York taxi drivers collectively speak 60 languages
#658 New York City is made up of 50 islands.
#660 The strike note of The Liberty Bell is E flat.
#661 Pigs were banished from Philadelphia’s city streets in 1710.
#662 Philadelphia was the first capital of the United States.
#663 Forty percent of America’s population lives within a one-day drive to Philadelphia.
#664 It is against the law to put pretzels in bags in Philadelphia.
#665 One in six doctors in America was trained in Philadelphia.
#667 The shoreline at Wildwood grows almost 100 feet per year.
#668 Cape May is the oldest seashore resort in America.
#669 In the game Monopoly, the properties are named after streets in Atlantic City.
#670 Long Beach Island was once frequented by pirates.
#671 There is a town called “Jersey Shore” in Pennsylvania.
#672 The Wildwood Boardwalk extends nearly two miles and has more than 70,000 wooden planks.
#673 The first Ferris wheel was built in Atlantic City in 1869.
#674 Snapple helped fund the creation of more than 138 new PSAL Teams.
#675 Snapple helped fund the creation of the C.H.A.M.P.S. Sports & Fitness Program, benefiting more than 15,000 NYC Public School Middle Students.

http://www1.coe.neu.edu/~dschilli/files/snapple_facts.html

Snapple Facts#1 - A Goldfish's attention span is three seconds.#2 - Animals that lay eggs don't have belly buttons.#3 - Beavers can hold their breathe for 45 minutes under water.#4 - Slugs have 4 noses.#5 - Camels have 3 eyelids.#6 - A honey bee can fly at 15mph.#7 - A queen bee can lay 800-1500 eggs per day.#8 - A bee has 5 eyes.#9 - The average speed of a housefly is 4.5 mph.#10 - Mosquitoes are attracted to people who just ate bananas.#11 - Flamingos are pink because they eat shrimp.#12 - Emus and Kangaroos cannot walk backward.#13 - Cats have over 100 vocal chords.#14 - Camel's milk does not curdle.#15 - All porcupines float in water.#16 - The world's termites outweigh the world's humans 10 to 1.#17 - A hummingbird weighs less then a penny.#18 - A jellyfish is 95% water.#19 - Children grow faster in the spring.#20 - Broccoli is the only vegetable that is also a flower.#21 - Almonds are part of the peach family.#22 - Alaska has the highest percentage of people who walk to work.#23 - The San Francisco Cable cars are the only mobile national monument.#24 - The state of Maine has 62 lighthouses.#25 - The only food that does not spoil is honey.#26 - The Hawaiian alphabet only has 12 letters.#27 - A ball of glass will bounce higher then a ball of rubber.#28 - Chewing gum while peeling onions will prevent you from crying.#29 - On average a human will spend up to 2 weeks kissing in his/her lifetime.#30 - Fish have eyelids.#31 - The average human will eat an average of 8 spiders while sleeping.#32 - There is one million ants to every human in the world.#33 - Termites eat through wood two times faster when listening to rock music!.#34 - If you keep a goldfish in a dark room it will eventually turn white.#35 - Elephants only sleep 2 hours a day.#36 - A duck's quack doesn't echo.#37 - A snail breathes through its foot.#38 - Fish cough.#39 - An ant's smell is stronger then a dog's.#40 - It is possible to lead a cow up stairs but not down.#41 - Shrimp can only swim backward.#42 - Frogs cannot swallow with their eyes open.#43 - A cat's lower jaw cannot move sideways.#44 - The bullfrog is the only animal that never sleeps.#45 - Elephants are capable of swimming 20 miles per day.#46 - Elephants are the only mammal that cannot jump.#47 - Giraffes have no vocal chords.#48 - Cats can hear ultrasound.#49 - Despite its hump...camels has a straight spine.#50 - Mosquitoes have 47 teeth.#51 - There is 63,360 inches in a mile.#52 - 11% of people in the world are left-handed.#53 - The average women consumes 6lbs of lipstick in her lifetime.#54 - The average smell weighs 760 nanograms.#55 - A human brain weighs about 3lbs.#56 - 1/4 of the bones in your body are in your feet.#57 - You blink over 10,000,000 times a year.#58 - A sneeze travels out of your nose at 100mph.#59 - Brain waves can be used to power an electric train.#60 - The tongue is the fastest healing part of the body.#61 - Pigs get sunburn.#62 - The lifespan of a taste bud is 10 days.#63 - The average human produces 10,000 gallons of saliva in a lifetime.#64 - Strawberries contain more Vitamin C then oranges.#65 - A one-day weather forecast requires about 10 billion math calculations.#66 - Americans on average eat 18 acres of pizza a day.#67 - There are 18 different animal shapes in the Animal cracker zoo.#68 - The longest one syllable word is "screeched".#69 - No word in the English language rhymes with month.#70 - A "jiffy" is actually 1/100 of a second.#71 - There is a town called "Big Ugly" in West Virginia.#72 - The average person uses 150 gallons of water per day for personal use.#73 - The average person spends 2 weeks of its life waiting for a traffic light to change.#74 - You share your birthday with 9 million others in the world.#75 - The average person makes 1,140 phone calls per year.#76 - The average person spends 2 years on the phone in his/her lifetime.#77 - No piece of paper can be folded more then 7 times.#78 - Alaska is the most eastern and western state in the US.#79 - There are 119 grooves on the edge of a quarter.#80 - About 18% of Animal owners share their bed with their pet.#81 - Alaska has more caribou then people.#82 - August has the highest percent of births.#83 - Googol is a number (1 followed by 100 zeros)#84 - Oysters can change genders back and forth.#85 - The Mona Lisa has no eyebrows.#86 - Until the 19th century solid blocks of tea were used as money in Siberia.#87 - A mile on the ocean and a mile on land are not the same distance.#88 - A ten gallon hat holds less then one gallon of liquid.#89 - The average American walks 18,000 steps a day.#90 - The average raindrop falls at 7mph.#91 - There are more telephones than people in Washington D.C..#92 - Fish can drown.#93 - A Kangaroo can jump 30 feet.#94 - Lizards communicate by doing push-ups.#95 - Squids can have eyeballs the size of volleyballs.#96 - The average American will eat 35,000 cookies in his/her lifetime.#97 - A turkey can run at 20mph.#98 - When the moon is directly over you, you weigh less.#99 - You burn 20 calories an hour chewing gum.#100 - In a year, the average person walks 4 miles making their bed.#101 - About half of all Americans are on a diet at any given time.#102 - A one-minute kiss burns 26 calories.#103 - Frowning burns more calories then smiling.#104 - There are more then 30,000 diets on public record.#105 - You will burn 7% more calories walking on hard dirt then pavement.#106 - You way less at the top of a mountain then sea level.#107 - You burn more calories sleeping then watching TV.#108 - Licking a stamp burns 10 calories.#109 - Smelling apples and/or bananas can help you lose weight.#110 - Frogs never drink.#111 - Only male turkeys gobble.#112 - At birth, a dalmatian is always pure white.#113 - The fastest recorded speed of a racehorse was over 43 mph.#114 - The oldest known animal was a tortoise, which lived to be 152 years old.#115 - .#116 - The largest fish is the whale shark - It can be over 50 feet long and weigh 2 tons.#117 - The starfish is the only animal that can turn it's stomach inside out.#118 - Honeybees are the only insects that create a form of food for humans.#119 - The hummingbird is the only bird that can fly backwards.#120 - The only continent without native reptiles or snakes is Antarctica.#121 - The only bird that can swim and not fly is a penguin.#122 - A duck can't walk without bobbing its head.#123 - Beavers were once the size of bears.#124 - Seals sleep only one and a half minutes at a time.#125 - Pigeons have been trained by the U.S. Coast Guard to spot people lost at sea.#126 - A pigeon's feathers are heavier than its bones.#127 - A hummingbird's heart beats 1,400 times a minute.#128 - Dragonflies have six legs but can't walk.#129 - Mosquitoes have 47 teeth.#130 - Koala and humans are the only animals with unique fingerprints.#131 - Penguins have an organ above their eyes that converts seawater to fresh water.#132 - A crocodile cannot move its tongue.#133 - Honeybees navigate by using the sun as a compass.#134 - An ant can lift 50 times its own weight.#135 - A single coffee tree produces only about a pound of coffee beans per year.#136 - Strawberries are the only fruits whose seeds grow on the outside.#137 - The city of Los Angeles has three times more automobiles than people.#138 - Hawaii is the only U.S. state that grows coffee.#139 - Hawaii is the only state with one school district.#140 - Holland is the only country with a national dog.#141 - The square dance is the official dance of the state of Washington.#142 - Hawaii is the only U.S. state never to report a temperature of zero degrees F or below.#143 - "Q" is the only letter in the alphabet not appearing in the name of any U.S. state.#144 - Texas is the only state that permits residents to cast absentee ballots from space.#145 - Lake Superior is the world's largest lake.#146 - The smallest county in America is New York County, better known as Manhattan.#147 - Panama is the only place in the world where you can see the sun rise on the Pacific and set on the Atlantic.#148 - The tallest man was 8 ft. 11 in.#149 - Theodore Roosevelt was the only president who was blind in one eye.#150 - The first sport to be filmed was boxing in 1894.#151 - The fastest served ball in tennis was clocked at 154 mph in 1963.#152 - In 1985, the fastest bicyclist was clocked at 154 mph.#153 - The speed limit in NYC was 8 mph in 1895.#154 - Americans spend more than $630 million a year on golf balls.#155 - In 1926, the first outdoor mini-golf courses were built on rooftops in NYC.#156 - Swimming pools in the U.S. contain enough water to cover San Francisco.#157 - The first TV soap opera debuted in 1946.#158 - The first MTV video was "Video Killed the Radio Star," by the Buggles.#159 - The first TV show ever to be put into reruns was "The Lone Ranger."#160 - One alternative title that had been considered for NBC's hit "Friends" was "Insomnia Cafe".#161 - The first TV networks kids show in the US was "Captain Kangaroo."#162 - The temperature of the sun can reach up to 15 million degrees fahrenheit.#163 - The first penny had the motto "Mind your own business".#164 - The first vacuum was so large, it was brought to a house by horses.#165 - Panama is the only place in the world where you can see the sun rise.#166 - Before mercury, brandy was used to fill thermometers.#167 - You have to play ping-pong for 12 hours to lose one pound.#168 - One brow wrinkle is the result of 200,000 frowns.#169 - The first human-made object to break the sound barrier was a whip.#170 - In 1878, the first telephone book ever issued contained only 50 names.#171 - The most sensitive parts of the body are the mouth and fingertips.#172 - The eye makes movements 50 times every second.#173 - Chinese is the most spoken language in the world.#174 - The world's biggest pyramid is not in Egypt, but in Mexico.#175 - In 1634, tulip bulbs were a form of currency in Holland.#176 - The first bike was called a hobbyhorse.#177 - The first sailing boats were built in Egypt.#178 - The first ballpoint pens were sold in 1945 for $12.00.#179 - The first lighthouse to use electricity was the Statue of Liberty in 1886.#180 - The first VCR was made in 1956 and was the size of a piano.#181 - The first jukebox was located in San Francisco in 1899.#182 - A rainbow can only be seen in the morning or late afternoon.#183 - The Capitol building in Washington DC has 365 steps to represent every day of the year.#184 - The most used letters in the English language are E, T, A, O, I and N.#185 - A male kangaroo is called a Boomer.#186 - A female kangaroo is called a flyer.#187 - There are over 61,000 pizzerias in the U.S.#188 - Antarctica is the driest, coldest, windiest and highest continent on earth.#189 - The Sahara Desert stretches father than the distance from California to New York.#190 - Thailand means "Land of the Free".#191 - Popcorn was invented by the American Indians.#192 - Jupiter spins so fast that there is a new sunrise nearly every ten hours.#193 - The year that read the same upside down was 1961. That won't happen again until 6009.#194 - You don't have to be a lawyer to be a Supreme Court Justice.#195 - Eleven of the fifty states are named after an actual person.#196 - If you doubled one penny every day for 30 days, you would have $5,368,709.#197 - The first person crossed Niagra Falls by tightrope in 1859.#198 - The US is the largest country names after an actual person (Amerigo Vespucci).#199 - The largest cheesecake ever-made weighed 57,508 lbs.#200 - The first country to use postcards was Austria.#201 - .
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-->#405 - The East Antarctic Ice Sheet is as thick as the Alps Mountains are high.#410 - Bald eagles can swim using a stroke similar to the butterfly stroke.#414 - Chameleons can move both their eyes in different directions at the same time.#440 - The pupils in goats' eyes are rectangular.#452 - There are approximately 9,000 taste buds on your tongue.#467 - Pluto takes 248 years to orbit the sun once.#469 - 454 U.S. dollar bills weigh exactly one pound.#470 - Dairy cows drink up to 50 gallons of water a day.#477 - A chalkboard eraser is one of the best ways to wipe a foggy windshield.

live, don't just be alive

cucumber kim chi = delicious. I rather enjoyed the episode of House tonight. I went and saw whip it. It was good. not amazing... but good. my eyes have been opened. but unfortunately i think they're bloodshot. tis but a mere eyedrop in the proverbial bucket. study closely young pupils. the eyes are the window to the soul. The sole purpose of life is to find purpose. and I, and my eyes walk on the soles of my tattered and torn converse until i find it. I am searching for meaning, but starting to realize the meaning is in the search. embrace the moment. live in the ripples of the water, live in the currents of the wind, live in the warmth of the sun and the shine of the moonlight.

insomnia and secret talking computers

My insomnia is worse than ever i think. eek it's 618 and I'm not asleep. sad. tomorrow comes my light box. I'm thrilled with the possibility of improvement and progress. i know a lot of secrets. I just realized that. I'm like a confidant for most people. october 4th is lauren's birthday. 5th is vince's dont' let me forget. saturday we are going to keys on main for laurens birthday. everybody should come. I hate the political climate in the us. it makes me want to remove my eyes with spoons and bathe them in acid. I just want logic to trump fear and emotion... just once in my life. it's like an allegory to my life (i don't know if i used that term correctly). I talked through a computer today. it was very strange. i felt so techy. my room is freezing. not like chilly freezing... like a tray of ice cubes in an igloo. i am an ice cube. my blankets form my igloo. Igloo is such a silly word. I like it.

i need new chucks, new jeans, a bk mocha joe (probably 2) and breakfast at 1230. i don't see any of those happening in the next 12 hours. sad.

mario is back. that makes me happy. i haven't been able to get a hold of him, but I'm exicted.

i want to do something fun tomorrow hit me up if you're interested...

shameless plug

andrew, my roommate... as many of you know is a super genius musical savant. Lately he has been recording new stuff, and it's fantastic. In the meantime, to those of you that have never heard him, or to those of you that haven't listened to him in a long time. do me a favor... go to

http://www.myspace.com/jimmybluemusic
and listen to going away and blood on my guitar

and go to
http://www.myspace.com/lettersforscarlett
and listen to "after you find yourself"
and "nothing to say"


listen to them, and show him some love.

kisses.
-lane

oh the gall... part two. hyperflinks are a chink in my armor.

my mother, like me, just had a "cholecystectomy, She is currently convaslescing nicely. Her surgery went a lot better than mine (thank god). In a bit of pain, but she is doing pretty well, and should be back to semi-normal very soon. I ordered a "light box, today. It should be here friday. That excites me greatly. I am curious how it will effect me. I'm convinced that I have a condition called "delayed sleep phase syndrome., and i pray that this helps me. It gets here friday. more news to come I'm sure. Today I was just trying to teach myself a little bit of html code, and hyper links and such. I hope that it worked out well. if not. apologies. Tomorrow, i have a list of tasks to do. fill ambien, buy chucks, go to the bank, etc. etc. i need to remember those. Whit, I am excited for my true religion jeans. you are the best. it is 1:22. that means it is time to take my final remaining half pill of ambien. Oh. caveat. If I ever helped you in any way, small, big, whatever. don't forget about me. I need some help of my own, and it seems that everyone i have helped have moved on and aren't there to help me, despite how much I need it. Who knew this would be a sad blog. it was supposed to be a "hyper" text email. tis all. I'm eligible for an upgraded phone. any suggestions anbyody? probably through t mobile... and I can't text on a touch screen because I shake too much. and of you close to my mom, call her, check in on her. she's a lovely lady, and deserves to know that people care about her and such. Wrote a paper for school tonight. miss school. i wish to go back. i probably won't. i need a 9-5 job i need structure, and i need a social network. I think i'm giving my social life until january first, and if not. mail order bride. I have been looking into \ mail order brides, and I think that if by the end of the year something doesn't change, I'm going to make that happen. I'm going to go watch ambien and take a house.


dyslexic kisses to you all.

lane

secret/girl/house season 6

this blog is about a girl. you know who you are. I have had lots of fun with you lately. Thank you for coming around lately and making me feel less sad. Your smile, your wit, your cooking (well, not yours), and your gregarious, sarcastic nature make me laugh, and get me out of my shell a little bit. there is a fire that burns inside your eyes, i think it's a mix of compassion, dedication, and focus. but looking in your eyes, i feel more alive. there's a cadence to your voice. it lifts up predictably and you predictably lift me up. thank you for helping me through life when I feel like I need a hand. It's been tough lately, but you have helped immensely. hopefully I'll talk to you tomorrow, and then perhaps go out on the weekend. meet me some friends, and fix me. love you all. I have a secret. I can't tell any of you guys though. sorry :(

i watched house premier last night too. I liked it. not loved it. I'm very anxious to see how it goes from here though. such a good show :) <3

wen wen

degaussed.

and this is why i love brand new.
if you kids haven't hear this song, enjoy the lyrics. so good.

Goodbye to sleep
I think this staying up is exactly what I need
Well take apart your head
Take apart the counting, and the flock it has bred

Goodbye to love
Well it's a ride that will push you up
Right against the wall
Take apart your head
Right against the wall
Chew it up and swallow it


You're brought back but you're running
I fell asleep at the incline
I can't shake this little feeling
I'll never get anything right

Goodbye you liar
Well you sipped from the cup but you don't own up to anything
Then you think you will inspire
Take apart your head
(And I wish I could inspire)
Take apart the demon, up in the attic to the left

(Goodbye my love)
You're brought back but you're running
(You wait right here, and they will come and pick you up)
Let's sleep at the incline
(I've been on pause, but I'm shaking off the rust)
I can't shake this tiny feeling
(I've lost my charge, I've been degaussed)
I'll never say anything right

(I'm on my own, I've been degaussed)
I'll never say anything right
(I'm on my own, I've been degaussed)
I'll never say anything right
(I'm on my own, I've been degaussed)
I'll never say anything right
I'm on my own

Take me, take me back to your bed
I love you so much that it hurts my head
Say, "I don't mind you under my skin.
I'll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in"
Well when we were made we were set apart
But life is a test and I get bad marks
Now some saint got the job of writing down my sins
The storm is coming
The storm is coming in

You're brought back but you're running
I fell asleep at the incline
I can't shake this little feeling
I'll never get anything right

I'm on my own
I'll never get anything right
I'm on my own

Take me, take me back to your bed
I love you so much that it hurts my head
I don't mind you under my skin
I'll let the bad parts in, the bad parts in
Well you're my favorite bird and when you sing
I really do wish that you'd wear my ring
No matter what they say, I am still the king
And now the storm is coming
The storm is coming in

"brand new" "muse"ings

I slummed around chat rooms today. It was actually a lot of fun. I "met" a ton of people, and had conversations with a ton of them via messenger. ha. good times. it allowed me to practice both my typing, my wit, and my social(asocial) skills. and, I played in a poker tournament during it, took second and won 171 dollars. can't complain. oh shit... i washed my sweaters though, and I forgot to put them in ze damn dryer. bollocks.

i should be asleep. I'm not. what's new?
I'm interested to see how the next couple weeks play out. it appears to be a transitional week for me. it's like a fork in the road, or a point before the eight legs of an octopus perhaps. there are a few different outcomes. but interesting. I am attracted to girl's with borderline personality disorder. it's tragic tragic tragic.

again, house starts soon. yay.
i want to play basketball.
i want to go snowmobiling
I'm a radical anarchist with a strange family that ages backwards.
i know you're wrong about sleep apnea.

my brain is too random. eek! I can't take it. I bet you blog readers wish to bathe my eyeballs in windex and soak my wounded hands in cobra venom. ataris concert friday with one of my bestest friends jee-hye. exciting... tomorrow, think that I will listen to the muse album some more and more. I dig it. everyone should listen. I'll listen to the brand new album and the muse album. it'll be awesome.

*blows kiss*
chee ow.

sentimental, sincere, hopeful... but fritzy phone. :/

phone is on the fritz. I try to respond to texts or calls, but i usually don't get them, and it's difficult if not impossible to send them. bk mocha joe, I plan on drinking two of you tomorrow morning. Waking up = not fun. I still wish to be good at sleeping. someday. sigh. The new house episode is in less that a week. john stewart and colbert started back up again today. It's been a good week for television.
I have good friends that I hang out quite a bit of the time now.
Jeff,
clint,
gaz,
and andrew and mer when they aren't busy.

hope to expand and broaden my circle until it becomes a globe. But, I only deal with sincere nice people now... so others, don't apply. If you're sincere, kick ass and nice, apply. Hopefully I'll hang out with mike more. I love and miss that kid. I'm shy, i need to get out of they shy funk. but it seems like a downward spiral. I have to right the ship, and set out on my voyage of clear destination. anyone that makes me more social or introduces me to new people will be forever remembered, and i will be forever indebted to you. I just need more friends. nice friends, friends that are single, nice, etc. anyone that makes it happen... a million hugs to you.

i believe that my pupils snuggle with my eyelids. millions of hugs, and kisses on a boat.

lane

move your eyes. okkkay?

I wrote this the other day. I neglected to publish it.

I read a lot about EMDR today. Previously, I thought that it was only implicated in the treatment of post-traumatic stress disorder, but apparently, the inventor, as well as the psychological literature suggest otherwise. For those that don't know EMDR stands for eye movement desensitization and reprocessing. It is a very intriguing source of research to me. From preliminary research, I have heard that it is just as effective as cognitive behavioral therapy or exposure methods In treating PTSD. Not only that, but it seems to work a lot faster. It's potential applications for depression or anxiety in general greatly intrigue me... and I think I just may purchase a book about it and give it a perusing. Lately I am thinking about writing a psychology blog to chronicle all the fascinating and cutting edge treatments that I come across. Maybe to educate some people on various disorders etc. Somebody come up with a clever title for it. That's your job. I also want to write a political blog. however, in this current entry, I don't feel like writing too much more. I threw away like 20 pairs of levis today, organized every drawer in my house, folded all my sweaters and was productive as shit. That's awesome. I think that I will go to sleep now. I watched tyson too. I liked it. watch it. ate lunch with my brother. Tried a beta blocker to stop my shaking. worked very well. I'm excited to go to sleep (or try). I love the new used album. kill the faggots, kill the lesbians, goddamn kill them all. That speech is classic crazy. If none of you have heard it, google it, kill whitey speech or something like that. wow. just wow. Khallid Muhammad or something like that.

"Don't feed me scraps from your bed. I won't be the cat that keeps coming back, just to be fed..."

7 cheers for folding all my sweaters. 8 cheers to proximity. 9 lives to cats.
meow, that's all for now.

racist kkkisses to you all.

and I have no idea why this got all formatted weird. shittay.

Dum spiro spero

amor vincit omnia, amantes sus amentes. I think I'm in love with sanity. venni vetti vecci. the fire rages on. Immodica ira creat insaniam. Non sum qualis eram. i am but my shell of a former self. Non est vivere sed valere vita est. Omnes una manet nox. Periculum in mora, Non sum qualis eram
this was horrible to me, it's all greek to me :p or latin, or whatever. i gunno go nighty nighthy ambi4n and sleep. kiss3s

rivers of conciousness. new them with an e.

cowabunga dude. last night was a bad night. at least I assume. ass. you. me. Seinfeld is good. again... the kkk took my baby away. a lot of baseball teams are named after birds. orioles, cardinals, red sox (okay the last one was named after a red sock... but still, you get the gist). I folded all my sweaters. go me. In second grade, i won a trapper keeper for being kick ass. origami means paper fold. or something like that. flamingos are pink because they are gay. okay I made that up. speaking of made up... burger king mocha joe's are fantastic! evander (spelling?) holyfield is missing part of his ear. It's a starry night. or should i stay starie night. chanda, where art though? if it ain't baroque, don't fix it. thanks savannah for changing my tire 5 years ago. actually not my tire, but nonetheless. that's three words smushed together. I used to play video games all the time. I used to golf all the time. Time, that ever insistent riple that pervades my every action. get up kids are coming in a few days. I would love to see them. won't. what a weird contraction. again... i reiterate.. only you can prevent forest fires. and half-ass elipses. my dash is shit. missing shit, but shit. Harps make you feel better about dying. beat it, asshole. I need new eans. 9 times out of ten, the answer is 80 percent. cal ripken. famous for stability. quarks, quirks. off-handed smirks. blue. the eiffel tower 65 years old. okay... not really. Michelle. my belle, I hope you're doing swell. swell meaning miserable. love you sarah.first girl i dated was kara. she went on to be miss utah or something. christmas is coming soon. Premature is an underused word. people say i look like hugh jackman. aladdin was a good show. (spelling)? apparently i lied about the spelling bee. rest homes smell funny. scrabble should be called "game that kicks ass" as I've mentioned before. donkeys can see all four of their legs at the same time. what was her name, ashley, i don't remember. but eye say cock a doodle doo to you. i mean cock eye say... okay. i'm just mean. chile verde. one of the things i miss. what the fuck was the other place. immigration canyon. banyon. i won an essay contest. I lick ass. k and l are so close to each other. like peas ina pod. 3rd grade kicked ass. monsoons are devastating. i like words that can be verbs or nouns. jesus christ that's a pretty face. Mandy Moore is super pretty. an increase in demand leads to increased air supply record sales. sell sale sail. bride, pride, step aside. out of stride. gum, I've succumb. mute. like a remote control (the tv show of course). mr ed. you're probably dead. that being said, I am a white in shining armor. I mean night...i mean knight. cu-knight. what a weird word. things get twisted. red, blue, i think green and yellow? love cows. want a mini cow as a pet. nearlly saud bet. bet you ddn't... hugh grant. two weeks. love the fog. the image of a handicapped person having sex with a door knob makes me smile. Gigolo was one of the words in the word scramble today. egg. chicken. kentucky. i blew on grass. seed what it would do. what, that maid know cents. 50 % or statistics including the word 50 percent are right. percocet, never taking it. I used to be good at tennis. hitler had a funny mustache. moustache. you're welcome. hirajuku girls (spelling) i have no doubt your kingdom is tragic, despite the not making cents. homonys ur soup er something like that. biggest city I've ever been to is new york. I want a sombrero, and pizza. I want hawaiian pineapple. pine plus apple equals pine apple.. why don't they just call it bluespruce red delicious. i think it has a better ring to it. dian hua. talk, electricallly like a side. Robert, other one was from alpine. he slid out of my life. rhymes with blessica henson, i should have rhymed with carried you. Jimmy ate the world. you spin me right round. write emersojn. do you think bobbing for cherries or using a neti pot is like watrboarding. not the fun kind on the ocean, but the fun feeling you get while surfing. spiders have eight legs. I have two. for now. balleronas can like stand up on their toes. i wonder if it is a mastodon is a extincrt member of the proboscidae famiy.I hate to be nosey. nosy? I thnk first is better. leona lewis. I bleed like a hemophiliac. kick back, a\paperntusack. trade of all jacks. lies. to me, take me apart and glew me. glee! 233 love me. gentle massage, and kfc chicken to you all.... kiss mes to you all is mes a words don't think i like to sew. 8th grade. i should have bagged it. the wheel of death. the skill of wycllef. love mack and cheese, old cars grow on me. not literally, stay in schoo, read. help homeless people. I go back to leona lewis. fur what it' worth. she is awesome like a blossom. kanaroos kick ass. sometimes literally.i wanted to say literarily. go big pun. I'm still not a player. i do however crush a lot. minor leauge baseball. broken necks. spine, swine, jeff. nothing else left, lay in pieces of full rest.

consciousness in ex-stream fashion.

I actually love love actually. I think that it is an amazing and fantastic show. one of my top five for sure. I love hugh grant too. Prostitutes are an odd phenomenon. as george carlin said... selling is legal, fucking is legal... so why the hell isn't selling fucking legal. I loved George Carlin, I went and saw him at abravanel hall once upon a time with my brother. My brother gets to do practicum stuff where he helps in therapy with people with a wide range of disorders. I'm jealous. I listened to an interesting podcast about dialectical behavior therapy. It's used to treat borderline personality disorder. I wonder how michelle is doing. I can't say whether i hope that it's good or bad. I'm not sure. Certain dry deodorant is the best... well, I guess technically it's an anti-persperant. Ants and the study of pheromones has always intrigued me. People that were giving oxytocin prior to being offered a business venture were 80% more likely to take the deal. I need a massage. my text messaging is all messed up. my phone is stupid and glitchy. damn dash. My glove box is broken. Vince broke it when we went to the gym. sad. I'm excited for winter, I get to wear gloves. yay! winter/fall i suppose. When all else fails by the ataris is such a good song. love it. My basset hound is so cute. he's getting old and has big ears. Barack obama kicks ass. I love wearing black shirts, they are so slimming. Johnny cash is fantastic. There are so many words for money in the english language. it reflects our values. There's a pointless message written on my mirror telling me to pay my hoa. I keep neglecting it. I'm hot like a left sink handle. When I was nine, my best friend was jason meyer. I won a poker tournament the other day. I had a pinball machine when i was little. It was kick ass. Once I had the chance between seeing the shows sigmund and freud and blue man group. If i would have known he was going to get mauled, i would have chosen the former. I need new chucks. Mine have holes and they are dirty. charles barkley was my favorite basketball player. He's got a gambling problem. The comedian Mitch Fatel cracks me up. Blueberry muffins are my favorite. I wish to shake it like a polaroid picture. the obadiah parker cover though. I love my blanket. it's so versatile. from summer to fall. I key a lot faster when I take a beta blocker. I <3 tiger army. billy goats are cute, sheep are baaaad. I wonder where monica lewinski is now. Canada is the biggest country on the continent of north america. My fifth grade teacher was Ms. Springer. I think, I may have made that up. The kkk tood my baby away. I haven't hung out with whitney in a long time. Cogito, ergo sum. i hate shopping carts with one bad wheel. stupid. I hate caves, I could never be a spelunker. phobias are silly. formicophilia is my favorite. the top 8 in myspace was stupid. talk about drama just waiting to happen. I always wanted a butler. maybe I still do. still waters run deep. i can't swim. Float on by modest mouse... i hated that song at first, but it subsequently grew on me. knockout mice are crazy. that definitely deserved the nobel prize. I watched tyson. pretty good. ala means wing in spanish. I love hispanic women. Only you can prevent forest fires. I need new make up. whoever decided to bottle and sell water was a genius. I wanted to go to a garage sale this year, I didn't. I won the spelling bee in sixth grade. My dad's original name was bethers. words with silent g's are weird. Kevin Smith is a smart man, I enjoy his films. I miss prince, it seems as if i haven't seen him in some time. :( i need to contact some people i haven't hung out with in a long time that I miss. namely brittany thatcher, janessa, and vince. I never was a fan of those jones sodas. overrated. ambien kicked in now I'm sedated. I'm elated, despite my bedtime being belated. insomnia is overrated. please disregard the shitty blog i've created :)

lucidity, I welcome you with open arms. I think we shall have a fun time tonight. i go to sleep now. grace me with your tender and comforting embrace.

xoxo

it feels like I'm trying to catch smoke

the new brand new album has grown on me quite a bit recently. Lyrically, I think it's much better than I anticipated. Maybe i just over-analyzed them, but they seem very deep and more complex than upon a cursory glance. I especially like "at the bottom" and "gasoline" at the moment. Noro is good too. and Vices is absolutely terrific. listen to them if you like brand new... or if you don't...

what an uneventful blog. damnit. c'est la vie I suppose.

kiss kiss.

attack of the panic!

This is from the deepest recesses of my recent struggle with panic attack/anxiety/depression

it was written a few weeks ago. and on klonopine and ambien. shortly after I had a panic attack. these are basically the thoughts that raced through my head at a million miles an hour.

I don't talk to a lot of my closer friends anymore, and all they see is this, so I figured I'd give them an update of what dark hole I'm trying to emerge from. (as of now, I have emerged some, and the panic, anxiety, etc. has gotten some better).

It's not coherent really. but deal with it.

alone,
solace, solitutde, solitary confinement, straight jacket confinement
it seems to be the path. a path that splits in two. a bipolar outcome
seems inevitable. Obsessed, the compulsions take over me. I'm attacked with
panic, my brain function is depressed, my heart beats anxious. narcissus,
your complexity has evaded me. anorexia, paranoia. delusion, or illusion,
do i even possess the mental faculties to tell. my attention races like my
heart would if it wasn't fixed in my chest. can you be phobic to life,
to time, to death.
klonopine, you calm me, a hacksaw to an infected limb.
ambien, you scatter my brain. attacks of ataxia, but not the sleep your
cylindrical bottle touts.
zoloft, I pray that you are the skilled surgeon that can remove the refuse
from my brain, the savior to set things right. so i can function, so i can
sleep, so I can be free from anxiety, and so I can be happy.
Lately I think of her. In fact her visage often awakes me in the night.
my arms, my legs, my face, my tongue tingle.. my heart beat races, my brain
fades in and out of coherence, and it seems as though my soul fades in and
out of existence. How could any one person be so cruel? More importantly how
can I keep that from jading me for the rest of my life? I'm lost in this life.
I'm 26, I don't know what I want to do with my life. I have no promising
career path, no significant other, few friends I can count on, and as a person
I have absolutely no clue who I am. How do I figure that out? how do i
realize what my passions are if haven't the slightest clue.
How do i stand up to people. How do I conquer the world. How do I realize
that life is short, and to let my behaviors be influenced by what others
think is absolutely asinine. Do I really care what strangers think of me...
am I really that scared of looking foolish in front of people. Why? and more
importantly, how the hell do i fix that. How can a person live a life not
being able to call and order a pizza, to talk on the phone to people that
are friends, let alone talk to a girl I've never met. what is my short time
strategy for life, what is my long term strategy? How do I make myself a
better person, how do I get up the courage, the energy, and the strength to
face the day... and if by some miracle I do get up to face the day, how
do I make that happy. How to I make me happy. How to I stop being so tired,
so shy, so lethargic and lazy. How do I actualize this potential that everybody
seems to think I have. What impetus is it going to take for me to change my life
I have faced a confluence of detriments lately. In the
middle of a shit storm, i imagine the best course of action would be to get
an umbrella and a shovel. I don't have either of those, and I don't know where
the fuck to find them.
I'm lonely. I don't have anybody I can relate with. i'm unhappy. i just want
life to be fun. i just want to be happy
the problem is three pronged (which probably have their own prongs)
1. anxiety, panic attacks, social phobia... the shit that just makes me
the way I am.
2.I have no confidants, nobody I feel that is on my level that I can share
anything with... It just seems like I'm alone in this world, and I have nobody
that truly understands me. I feel superior to everyone else, conceited or not,
I don't feel like anybody can relate to me.
3. I have no emotionally intimate companion. Nobody I can sit down with to
rub my back, ask me how my day went, cuddle with me, and just be there for
me all thee time lookin forward to seeing me as much as i look forward to
see her...
i wonder if I'll ever get married?
or if i'll be alone forever.
there needs to be an outline, a recovery plan. short term. long term.
how do i meet friends?
how do i walk better?
how do i dress better?
how do i make my life more interesting?
how do i live a life that gives me pleasure?

brain storm of solutions.

relaxation techniques
klonopine
beta blockers
therapy
hypnosis
biofeedback
yoga
acupuncture
eat healthy
vitamin d
exercise
meticulous house, meticulous mind
meticulous organization, same thing
go to the U and research panic disorder, social phobia, anxiety disorders

what does two years from now hold? what do I want it to hold? How do I make
these things come true?

what is my purpose in life?
Who am i as a person?
who do i want to be as a person?
what people do i want to surround myself with?
how do i go about finding those people?

fuck. fuck. fuck.

insomnia O_O

is dumb. and stupid... and that's all I have to say about that.

zombie state sleepy can't sleep lane kisses to you all O_O

spicy.

I took salsa lessons today. I have two left feet. and three legs, that makes it hard to dance. My partner is lovely though. yay. go me.
I have been more social lately. yay!
For some reason I shake like an epileptic at a rave though. that's no bueno.
I listened to a podcast on ketamine as a possible intervention for treatment resistant depression. fascinating.
I have the new brand new album and the new used album. that makes me happy. p.s. if you analyze those sentences they sound super funny. "new brand new" "new used" ha. that's silly.
speaking of silly. 56 people signed the declaration of independence. i may have made that up. Jalapeno soup is lovely. I love the movie adventureland. Everybody should see it. I used to really like mike tyson when I was a little kid. Too bad he turned into a rapist/crazy/ear biter. only boxer I ever liked to watch. Prince has to have surgery. He has a bump. pretty routine, but surgery nonetheless. Nevada has the most individual mountain peaks in the united states. Phoenix is the most populated capital city in the united states. i talked to Marcela tonight. I haven't seen/talked to her in forever. I rarely take good photographs. I think I'm the most unphotogenic person alive. I have two cuts on my finger. they look like vampire bites. I saw the show "bite" at the stratosphere once. not worth the money, but it was enertaining. I also saw blue man group (a couple of times). eye contact is weird. I'm trying to get better at holding it. I can't believe how many people cross their arms or play with their hair in large groups. I have to try my hardest not to do it. Labor day weekend is this week (I think at least?) I believe my friend from baltimore is coming in. that's lovely. People that play bass for a living just play with four pieces of string all day. That sounds like a kick ass job. donkeys eyes are positioned so that they can see all four of their legs at the same time. I saw bears playing hockey. Google it, it was awesome. My english accent is pretty good now adays. I think my american one is shit though. I'm sad the gallivan center concert series is over. Bull rides kick ass. despite them being unsuccessful. today i ate bean fold overs for breakfast. pretty good. pumpkin chocolate chip cookie too. (and lots and lots of coffee). Halloween is coming up soon. I carved a pumpkin once. it looked retarded. Can you say retarded... or is that an offensive word? I'm not sure. it looked like a pumpkin with a severe pervasive developmental disorder. perhaps that's better. The DSM V comes out in 2010. that makes me excited. my computer (laptop had 2 gb free out of 160. eek. i fixed it. it runs better now. september 26th, I want to walk in the NAMI walk. (I think it was called nami. somebody should walk with me. national academy of mental illness or something. go charity.

beauty is a lie to old sweetly. flesh is heretic. scrabble is angellic. My mother and I are going on a vacation in a month. we're kick ass. just a baby one. but we're kick ass. panic attacks are strange. I listened to a lot of information about them yesterday. girl at my house had a panic attack. guy with an unbuttoned button up shirt wanted to beat me up. it was silly. I was in a onesie and a mexico beanie. sesame (fake) chicken is good too. coffee takes like ass... but it sure picks me up. gee whiz. went to fetish night at area 51 for clint's birthday. Odd group of people. Naked people being carried around by collars. pleather, whips, etc. my kind of party. ha ;)

his real birthday is tomorrow... i hope i don't damn forget. whit, if you read this and remember, remind me. Gaz is brittish, hell of a kid. Sincere and true friend. He's a car detailer. If you ever need your car detailed by a man that worked for bently/landover, he's one of the best in the state, and reasonably priced. if you want your car detailed, let me know, and I'll see what I can swing. Sorry to plug that there... not usually my style. speaking of plugs. I need to fix the one in the bathroom. screw it, double entendre.

I hope fall happens soon. I want to wear my sweaters and shit. I love king size beds.. and penguins. not sure if I'm a fan of them both together... but i'd certainly give it a try. I think it night night time. besos.

say cheese! it gives you fat fingers. er;; dsof@

but surely I digress... I always liked that saying... but surely i digress, let me dive right into it. people never cease to amaze me. whether that's good, bad, or indifferent, is not the point. the point is the sense of wonderment and wondering what it meant. I'm spent. I haven't slept well in days. I feel in a general malaise. like the rat that just can't quite get through the maze. fuck cheese. is that really a sufficient reward for navigating this convoluted maze. That's the question I struggle to answer. what if I don't want the cheese... what if i just want to sit and admire the complexity of the maze. I'm not sure what i want... and If i want the cheese, what kind of cheese do I want. where do I buy this cheese. who stole my cheese (read that book) i think my cheese is swiss. it has unfilled holes in it. But surely, I digress ;)

my fingers moved. i'm not going to retype it. it wasn't that poignant anyway. i was just rambling on. fat fucking fingers. le sad - o... that's french and spanish for sad.

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this maid know cents.

i had my best scrabble score today. 506. and my best word... 186... a triple triple with the word "ambition." go me. I am by no means a scrabble professional... but I sure do enjoy it. the taco bell "fourth meal" is a stupid advertising ploy. Is that really what fat america needs? the addition of an extra meal. silly.

the ataris are coming in a month. that makes me excited. I <3 their new song too. I don't write in my blog anymore, but I think for the remainder of this blog, I will speak in homonyms whenever possible. This weekend was fun. Eye hung out with a lot of people eye had knot scene inn sum thyme. Eye danced my ass off, socialized with every won, and even maid some knew friends. good thymes. Saturday went two a party at Sarah's house. It was low key, butt fun. Today, eye took it a little easy. I just went to Sam's where she was nice enough too let me eat her food, and showed me pitchers from they're trip two europe. it looked like sew much fun. Eye was jealous. ewe wood bee two. This blog is about nothing. silly. Eye do knot really have much to right about. I fill knot creative. In the next weaks eye wood like two hang out with some of my friends.Eye fill very asocial, and eye need two bee social. sum body help me with that. eye figure this blog is better than know blog at all... though eye am quickly changing my mind. :p soon eye will right a real won. let me end bye saying... pleas, pleas pass healthcare reform. Are system is a joke, and i want too stop paying sew much money ever month even though eye am a healthy 26 year old mail. it is just dumb. Go public option! good luck.

love awl of ewe.

homo(nym) kisses to you all.

oh baby... I want healthcare legislation.

Angela is having her baby as we speak... yay! And so completes the cycle of everybody I know having a baby. Oddly enough Camrann's wedding is tomorrow... and it marks the beginning of the cycle of everybody I know getting married...

I am very pro public health care plan (probably because I pay 200 dollars a month for insurance, despite being a healthy 26 year old). I think that certain things shouldn't be left to the free market mentality. It makes absolutely no sense to me that pharmaceutical companies and insurance companies make assloads of money. The CEO of Aetna, for example, made over 24 million dollars last year. That's nauseating. The problem with the health industry is that they make money based on people being sick. The less healthy the population, the more pharmaceutical companies and the capitalistic healthcare juggernaut profit. When health care is based on profit rather than the well-being of the population, of course there will be abysmal health care, insurance companies that exclude people who need health care the most, and an obese, pharmaceutical dependent population. Encourage prevention before costly conditions occur. don't just treat them after. Diabetes, cancer, heart disease... all are extremely expensive. Yet, there are many things our healthcare system could do to lessen the percentage of the population that will develop these disorders. Exercise, A healthy diet, drinking less alcohol, smoking less, Regular check-ups... all of these things would drastically reduce the prevalence of these illnesses... All of these things cost next to nothing compared with the treatments of these disorders. Our thinking must shift to a prevention based paradigm. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure, or however the saying goes. Anyhow, tangents aside, back to what I was initially going to say about a public option for healthcare.

There are two arguments that I hear time and time again against why we should include a public plan in the health care legislation. 1.) The government can't run anything efficiently, medical facilities will have ridiculous waiting periods and mediocre treatment at best.
2.) If you create a public health plan, it will drive the private sector insurance companies out of business because they won't be able to compete with the public plan.

I hate, hate, hate these two statements being brought up in the same argument. It doesn't make any fucking sense! Health care will be so shitty, with lines out the door, and horrible, incompetent doctors... but the private insurance companies could never compete with a government plan! It makes no sense. If the care they provide is so much better, they will have no problem going against a government plan. I am fine with people making one argument or the other... but you can't have both. It's just silly.

The first argument. Look at all the other civilized countries in the world. They all have government plans. A government plan doesn't have to be the only option... but give people the choice. (Senators, congressmen are covered by a "government ran program" for god's sake). Furthermore, medicare ( a government run program) is very effective, affordable, and has a high satisfaction rate. It also goes without saying that the same people who argue that a government can't run anything efficiently should be concentrating on getting rid of the government control of other federally run programs like say, the military for example...

To the second argument, I say, why are we so concerned about private heatlh insurance companies staying in business... shouldn't we be more concerned about the welfare of the people than a ceo of Aetna's 24 million dollar a year salary? Not to mention the lessening of burden that would be ameliorated by shifting from an employer based health care system, and the increased productivity having a healthy, productive workforce would yield... I just don't get it. ugh.

that was a bunch of horribly written run on sentences and grammatical foibles all smashed into a short little space. eek. I hope you can make sense of my wonderful word salad. my apologies.

here's hoping a peaceful slumber shall restore my eloquence and grammatical prowess ;)

bear hugs and high fives to you all

-Lane

alas, I can spread my wings and fly. (ps. this title is clever if you speak spanish)

The competition is over. I have emerged from my cocoon of social isolation, and I am a baby butterfly eager to flap his wings. The amount of ambition, drive, and optimism I have is unparalleled. I only hope that some of you will join in my unbridled enthusiasm for life. I plan on doing lots of stuff in the upcoming months. I want to try any and everything, and live life to it's fullest. Anyone who wishes to accompany me, do it. If you have any ideas about kick ass things I should do in the next few months, please, feel free to share them with me.
etc. etc. you get the point.

the competition went lovely, it proved to me that I am a tenacious, dedicated individual, and I am proud of what I accomplished. I'm lucky to be able to make so much money for doing something as silly as playing poker. I consider myself one of the most fortunate people alive.

I'm still kind of lonely. It's frustrating feeling so optimistic about life but having nobody to share it with. This too shall pass I assume, but in the meantime, it's frustrating. Instead of it getting me down or deterring me though, I use it as motivation to make myself the absolute best person I can be... and I am so enthusiastic about the direction my life appears to be moving in. I've had a lot of interesting experiences lately, but i unfortunately do not have the time to go in to them at length. one of my best friends (from the time I was 5 or so) got married just over a week ago. It was fantastic to see him so happy and to be there for that moment in his life. Brought a tear to my eye... literally. Sentimental old chap I am. I received the Tao a couple of days ago. So, I am officially a Taoist. That's kind of cool :) The ceremony was very interesting, pretty, and an overall great experience.

life is beautiful.

I'm so excited to be done with the poker competition and have shitloads of free time :D So So So, excited.

addio.

it's a quarter past sleepy time, and I hate not being punctual ;)

valien, ambium

I have a date, in about six minutes. His name is pillow. He makes me feel so comfortable, I feel like when I'm around him, I can just shut my eyes and close off the world ;)

It's June, it feels as if it came so soon.

but my poker playing binge will come to a proverbial purge soon. That excites me. I can't wait to catch up on the other areas of my life that have been put on hold.

Penguins are so fucking cute... and who the fuck puts celery in a pasta salad. That's just non-sense.
Andy Warhol died after a "routine gall-bladder surgery." I'm glad I didn't know that shit before. Some of my favorite things. a glass of water completely stuffed with ice. King size beds with new sheets and pillow cases. Waterfalls. The fog. Music with violins. the smell of bondo. Lucid dreaming, cryptoquotes, the smell of vanilla. Me.

My fan is set on three, I think that I shall turn it down to one.

If the lakers win the championship, I will be sad. Go Orlando. Either way, i guess each of them are close to disneyland or disneyworld.... so that's convenient.

hen fang bian or something like that.

I knew how to say snail in spanish yesterday... i forgot. caracol or something like that? perhaps. I'm too lazy to look it up.

I hate hang nails. I love the movie V for Vendetta. I am watching V for Vendetta, and I have a hangnail... I guess the two kind of cancel each other out.

Note to self. June 6th. baby shower. wedding. don't forget.

People from England are English, People from argentina are argentinian, people from china our chinese, people from japan are japanese, people from portugal, portugese... etc. etc. Why the fuck are people from spain spanish. Why not spainish? makes no sense to me. dumb.

I love palindromes: radar, mom, civic, level, racecar, redivider (longest palindromic word), deified (another very good one), a toyota, never odd or even (awesome), was it a car or a cat i saw? (equally awesome)

those make me smile. You know what's fucking nuts? I spelled each and every one of them backward. I am a rebel.

Bolivia has two capitals. La Paz, and Sucre. I believe that Sucre is the highest capital in the world, as far as elevation goes. I may have made that up though. I'm not sure.

I want a mini cow as a pet.

Prairie Voles are an interesting little species. studying them is how we have found out much of the information we have on human "love"

When I was little, Lady and the Tramp was my favorite movie :)

I go to sleep now.

ciao like mein.

oh. chow mein translates as "fried noodle" in mandarin i believe, but it isn't spelled like that. chao mian I think. I dunno. My pinyin is subpar due to the lack of attention i've paid it lately.

kisses... lady and the tramp, spaghetti noodle meet in the middle kisses... to you all

;)

three, two, onesie!

Does she ever miss me?

god I miss her.

I had the most amazing horrible dream last night. I hate falling asleep. I can't keep myself from dreaming about her. The days are fantastic... but the thoughts creep in when I'm unconscious and I can't stop them. That's why I have insomnia. I dread sleeping. I know once I can't control my brain it will drift to her. and i suppose that is what it is. Life is funny. a rollercoaster that I wouldn't miss for the world. The ups, the downs, you can't have one without the other I suppose... but enough about that.

Sarah 1. you are fired. you were supposed to come hang out tonight... but you went mia. dumb. I wanted to see your face today.

Whitney, I love your fucking guts. You are the best friend I could ever ask for. You have been through some of the toughest times in my life, and you are single-handedly the reason I got through them. Not to mention, you have the most amazing smile and personality ever. Janessa, you too. seriously. You are the most amazing person in this world. I can't wait for you to be a mother. That kid is the luckiest kid in the world... and not only because of you and the myriad of positive characteristics you possess... but your husband is an amazing intelligent, compassionate, wonderful person too. I can't believe two amazing people like you ended up together. Seriously, your kid. aka my godchild *hint hint* is going to be the luckiest little bundle of flesh to ever be brought into this world. Vince, I have known you for 20 years, and you never cease to amaze me, you are an amazing person, and one of the few people that I can count on. I learn to be a better person when I hang out with you. Your sense of style, your humility, your ability to bring out the best in everybody around you in such a positive way fascinates me. Robert, I haven't seen you in so long, but my life is better for having known you. You are one of the few people with a totally different view on life that complements my life. My mind is expanded for having known you. I enjoy every second we ever hang out, and every conversation we've ever had. Samantha, words can't even express how much you have impacted my life. viva la project revolution. It will become my reality... and because of you. I am so completely ecstatic for your upcoming nuptuals. Out of anybody in the world, I would say that absolutely nobody is worthy to be with you. Except Steve. He is fantastic, smart, and a person that I am proud to call my friend... and nothing makes me happier than the fact that you guys are together. Sarah 1, despite you not texting me back, I think that you are one of the most beautiful, compassionate, intelligent, impressive people that I have ever met. Mario, Meredith, Sarah 2, I had so much fun with you guys tonight, and every night for that matter. Thank you for taking me out despite the fact I am in a pond of self pity and loneliness. I needed it, and I appreciate you more than you will ever know. Angela Oh, you don't read this, but you are such an amazing person, I can't believe how dedicated, driven, intelligent, social, and thoughtful you are. My life is better for having known you. Angela Larson, I can't wait for you to have your baby. Out of anyone, you are one of the most fun, most down to earth, gregarious, outgoing people that I have ever met, and I love every ounce of your native american guts. Joby, Camrann, I haven't seen you fucks in forever, but you have made me the person I am today. Thank you for your friendship, and the lengths you have gone to for me, I wouldn't know half the people I know today, I wouldn't have overcome my shyness, I wouldn't have known what friendship was without you. Mario, you Mexican fuck. I envy your personable nature and your outlook on life, I am glad that we have become friends, and can't wait to see what the future has in store for you and us as friends. Thank you. Brittany Thatcher, you are me, but with two x chromosomes. i envy the person you have become. You are a wonderful mother, a wonderful wife, and a wonderful friend. I aspire to be the person you are some day. you are amazing, on so many different levels. Chanda, I haven't seen you in forever, but I miss your smile, I miss your sense of humor, and I miss the way you understood me.... my quirkiness and all. lauren, you are one of the people that I can count on. You would drop anything for me if I needed the slightest of things. You are honest with me, and you have never ever been anything but a great friend. I love your face. Meredith, I have known you for a short time, but I must say that you are one of the most compassionate, fun to be around, prettiest people i have ever met. I love how much you care for animals, I love how nice and inclusive you are to me. Thank you. Sarah 2, You are sassy, pretty, witty, funny, and an immense pleasure to be around. You are going to take the world by storm, and I envy that. Sarah 4, I have also known you for a short time, but your drive, your intelligence, and your capacity for greatness blow me away. I'm happy to say that I know you. Celeste, I miss your guts. It's a shame you moved to Texas, you were, and are, one of my favorite people for countless reasons. Adam, you are a fuck for moving to Texas too. One of the few people that could teach me something, make me laugh, and be a sarcastic little bitch like me, all at the same time. Not to mention your taste in music was flawless. Last, but not least, Andrew. you are my roommate, my confidant, and the best friend anybody could ask for. The strange quirkiness of mine you put up with, the things you do for me, the complete and utter humility you have despite being one of the most amazing people I know, strikes me with awe and wonderment. I am proud of the person you are. Your son is blessed to have you as a father, and I am blessed to have you as a friend and as a roommate. You are a remarkable person, and I appreciate our friendship more than you will ever know. I could go on for days. These are the friends that I am blessed with.. My heart is full of love for each and everyone of you, as well as the ones that I didn't have time to get to. This isn't even beginning to get started on how wonderful my family is. Words can't capture, or begin to try to capture how thankful I am for my brother, sister in law, mother and father. Without them, I don't know what I would do. I could write an entire blog entry about each of them, but I don't have the time or the finger strength to write a novel that lengthy at this time. Suffice to say, everything that I admire about myself, I learned from one of them. I am the most blessed person in the world. My sincerity and gratitude will never be accurately encapsulated through words. Thank you to everyone. I skipped a few people, but know that you have equally touched my life. It's amazing what you can take for granted if you don't stop to think about the fortune you are blessed with. I love each and every one of you.


I'm wearing a onesie, chucks, and a mexico beanie. I look like a bad ass. and by bad, I mean retarded. There is a girl passed out in my bathroom, another passed out on my couch. life is funny. I reiterate, life is funny. Not funny like comedian funny. funny like tragic comedy funny. haha

kisses to all :)