long overdue

long overdue... I know. All is right in the world. My faith in the human race restored. Another year older. My birthday was a few days ago, and I don't know that I've felt that loved in sometime. Thanks to all you thoughtful bitches that remembered my birthday, and those that made it especially good times for one reason or another (Natalie, Sam, Mike, Andrew, Celeste, Robert)... Kisses.

PS Samantha is the best fucking roommate ever, and we have kick ass times. We got flames Samantha! We got flames!

it's been an engaging month

So... I'm engaged, to the most wonderful, amazing person alive. te amo prometida! I have a big boy job interview tomorrow. One where I feel the salary is actually high enough that it isn't a complete waste of my time. I'm so bored not working. It really is overrated.

So many stories for this blog, so little time it seems. So I'll just throw them out there, rapid fire style. I love my new car, it is so goddamn fast. I got stuck in a snowstorm, slept at ze goddamn gas station. Levi got married. I hung out with Greg who was in town from Washington. Saw Mike and Andrew's band play; they were very good. Am currently in love with Mikado, and or Happy Sumo. My Chinese is progressing and it makes me smile. I went to the Barnes and Noble and bought like 15 books the other day that seem super interesting... for example, one is called "Why do men have nipples" :) I love love love the Leona Lewis album. Got a new bedroom set. My dog is snoring super loudly (cute little fucker). Samantha Odle is an amazing person, and I love her guts. I'm looking at buying real estate in Costa Rica. A cute villa or such. I weigh less than I've weighed in 5 years. I want to go to Vegas for my birthday (first part of April). Clear your schedules bitches.

-kisses

okay. for those of you who took it literally. i'm not engaged. i was kidding.

So, today I was supposed to hang out with Noble, I didn't... cry cry. I met some new people though, and I hung out with an old friend that I hadn't seen in quite some time. Tomorrow I'm going to hang out with pretty girls for a bit... then perhaps go to the hotel. I go sleep now.

kisses bitches.

fuck eight generations of your ancestors, you have a face like a rotting cunt

I learned how to swear in chinese today. It made me happy :) I think I'm going to translate them literally and use them daily Wo xi wang ni man man si, dan kuai dian xia di yu!	I wish you a slow death, but a quick ride to hell!
我希望你慢慢死，但快点下地狱。
Zhu tou	Pig head
猪头
Qin wode pigu	Kiss my ass
亲我的屁股
Gan ni niang	Motherfucker
干你娘
Gou shi	Dog shit
狗屎
Shi	Shit
屎
Ni shi bai chi	You are an idiot
你是白痴
Ni shi hun dan	You are a rotten egg
你是混蛋
Ni shi sha gua	You are a fool
你是傻瓜
Si lang gou	Dead man doggie
死狼狗
Tong xing lian	Gay
同性恋
Cao ni ma	Fuck your mother
操你妈
Cao!	Fuck!
操！
Ta ma de!	Oh Shit!
他妈的！
Wo cao	(I) fuck
我操！
Shen jing bing	Lunatic
神经病
Sha gua	Retard (lit. stupid melon)
傻瓜
Chun zi	Moron
蠢子
Wang ba dan	Bastard
王八蛋
Chou wang ba dan	Lousy bastard
臭王八蛋
Ji nv	Whore
妓女
Mai bi	Buy pussy
买屄
Cao ni zu zong shi ba dai	Fuck the 18 generations of your ancestors
操你祖宗十八代
Ha bang	Suck one's dick
Ha wo deh bang	Suck my dick
Tian yin	Eat pussy
舔阴
Gan ni ba	Fuck your dad
干你爸
Gan ni lao shi	Fuck your teacher (for not teaching you)
干你老师
Chi shi!	Go eat shit! (Equivalent to "Fuck off!")
吃屎！
Diao	Dick, cock
屌
Ji ba	Dick, cock
鸡巴
Nee yin	Vagina (polite)
Ji bai	Pussy (bad insult to a man)
Bo ba	Huge tits
波霸
Too zai zi	Son of a rabbit
兔崽子
Yangwei	Impotent
阳萎
Da diao	Big dick
大屌
Yin yang ren	Hermaphrodite
阴阳人
Lao mao	Pimp
Pi tiao ke	Trick (prostitute's client)
皮条客
Gao wan	Testicles
睾丸
Chou ba guai	Ugly as hell
Gan tsao	To fuck
Zi wei	Masturbate
自慰
Yang gui zi	Foreign devil
洋鬼子
Cao ni ma!	Fuck your mother!
操你妈
Fang pi	To fart (lit. to let your ass go)
放屁
Langun	Dick (lit. man root)
Ni meiyou langun	You have no dick!
Ni juede wo hen ben ma?	Do you think I'm an idiot?
你觉得我很笨吗？
Ni shi pian zi!	You are a cheat!
Ni xin tai hei le!	Your heart is black!
你心太黑了
Yanse lang	Male whore (lit. colored wolf)
Se mi mi de ren	Lecherous
色迷迷的人
Si san ba	Bitch
Ni male ge bi	Your mother's a cunt
你妈了个屄
Chou san ba	Bitch
臭三八
Hu li jing	Bitch (a flirtatious woman)
狐狸精
Shabi	Dumb cunt (used like motherfucker)
傻屄
Da Shabi	Big dumb cunt
大傻屄
Cho yade	Smelly slave wench
Cho ji bai	Smelly cunt
Da shou qiang	Masturbate
打手枪
Wo cao ni ba bei zi zu zong	Fuck eight generations of your ancestors
我操你八辈子祖宗
Tzau ni Daye	Fuck your uncle
Ni ya lian zhang de gen lan bi shi de	You have a face like a rotting cunt
你丫脸长的跟烂屄似的
Gun dan	Fuck off
滚蛋
Pi hua	Bullshit
屁话
Chi shi	Eat shit
吃屎
Chi wo de shi	Eat my shit
吃我的屎
Chee jiao	Eat my dick (lit: eat banana)
Gan ni lao ma pi gu	Fuck your mother's ass
干你老妈屁股
Qu di yu	Go to hell!
去地狱
Wo cao ni ye ye de sao pi yan	Fuck your grandfather's piss stinking arsehole
我操你爷爷的骚屁眼
Cao ni de xing	Fuck your family name
操你的姓
Ni you piao liang de lv mao zi	Your wife is cheating on you (lit. you have a pretty green hat) [Strong insult in China]
你有漂亮的绿帽子
Wa Cao(ch-ao)!	Holy fuck!
Ni shi wo de biao zv	You are my bitch
Cao ni gege	Fuck your older brother
Cao ni didi	Fuck your younger brother
你有问题	You have a (mental) problem
Nide muchin shr ega da wukwei	Your mother is a big turtle

I'm like a bird (a dove to be exact)

in my front yard today, a falcon swooped from the sky and pounced on an unsuspecting dove. First of all... what the fuck is a dove doing in my front yard? Second... what the fuck is a falcon doing in my front yard? Third... what the fuck? I felt like I was watching a discovery special on predatory birds... does that shit really happen in the suburbs? This dove was one of the most beautiful things I've ever seen. It was the purest color white. So pretty, so innocent, so pure.

I saw two things. That beautiful, breathtaking white bird, the blood staining it's immaculate feathers. Its ravaged body laying in the snow, twitching in excruciating pain as as the life was leaving it's body.
and the falcon... this predatory parasite of a beast engrossed in carnage, ripping out the flesh of this bird with an insatiable fervor.

and I thought about it as it symbolically encapsulates relationships... and I started to think would I rather be the falcon or the dove... would I rather be so beautiful, so pure, so trusting and innocent and meet metaphorical carnage... or would I rather be the falcon. cold, calculating, no remorse, but with the absence of vulnerability?

i really like nice people. It's funny how far and few between they are. i was hanging out with a certain girl today, and I have to say that she is one of the most noble people I've ever met. In fact, let's just give her the nickname noble .I was with the Noble, and about 10 of her friends. A couple of the people there were mad at one of their "friends" and started to talk all sorts of malevolent, slanderous, hurtful shit. Everybody jumped on the shit-talking bandwagon. The ring-leader was the best friend of Noble. People kept saying so and so is a bitch... isn't she noble! Noble, time and time again said... No, I think she's nice. No, I like her... etc etc.

I asked myself, how many people would do that... how many people would stand up to a gang of their friends and take the side of somebody that wasn't even there... the answer to my rhetorical question... not very many.

There's not a lot of people that I admire, Noble is definitely an exception. i love people that are genuinely nice... people that look for the good qualities in people instead of the bad. People that you know that when you aren't around them, they still have nothing but good things to say about you. I hope to surround myself with those people. I hope to be one of those people.

For some reason, it seems to be human nature to talk shit. Some innate instinct to belittle in order to boost your own ego. However, if you look at it from a logical perspective, in today's society, it's counter-evolutionary. i think that few people realize this important fact. Talking shit, though intended to make you look better, makes you look like a complete douchebag. How often do you hear somebody say... "Oh my god, I love so and so... you should hear the mean things they say about this person! It's awesome. They're so ruthless and conniving, I want to surround myself with them and put all my trust in them!" um... no. That's absurd. I'm also a firm believer that the opposite is actually true. I think that if you have good things to say about a person when they aren't around, or you stick up for somebody when they aren't around, it makes people really respect and admire you.

Hypothetical situation... maybe it's just my perception... but imagine the following scenario playing out. scenario a.)) Charlie, Tom, and Carl work together. Carl walks away and Tom says to Charlie.... "that Carl is so stupid, and the only reason he works here is because his cousin used to work here.

scenario b.)) Charlie, Tom, and Carl... again, Carl walks away Tom says to Charlie "Tom is such a smart guy, and he works so hard. I'm glad we work with him.

which Tom would you like more? the one in scenario a, or the one in scenario b?

it seems so obvious to me... but apparently it's not, because gossip and vilification seem to be the norm. So the moral of the story. Be nice. Ignore your instinct to talk shit. It only makes you look like an asshole. Take the high road. You'll be a better person for it, and other people will think so too. I apologize that I write like an elementary school kid. my thoughts are disjointed, unorganized, and horribly written.. . not to mention my grammar is shit, and I use ellipses a million times in each couple of lines. I'm going to blame it on the klonopine. hopefully nobody will talk shit about me because of it ;)

okay. tangent this deserves a blog of it's own... but I'm tired and figure I should say something about it in passing at least. First, I bought a new car. A 51 Dodge Business Coupe. It's a 12 second car... which means nothing to feminine lane... but I'm told it's pretty damn fast. It has flames and is super masculine. ha! I'm excited. I'm a manly man bitches ;) In all actuality, there was two reasons I got it. one a chance to bond with my father... that's his livelihood, and it will be nice to have some common bond with him. Second of all, it was a very good investment. My dad gets super cheap deals on cars, and I got this car for an amazing price. As far as me going fast or having an expensive car... not really for me... i think it will be kind of silly to see me having the car. So not my style. But, I'm very excited about it.

Oh also, I bought an investment house in ogden. 69k needs 25k in work. fixed up should be able to sell for 125 worst case scenario... 140 best case scenario... and that 25k in work is contracted out... because most of us know that I haven't done an ounce of hard work in my life... and I certainly don't intend to start now :) Furthermore, I lent some money for a share of equity in a reak estate llc called "vaunt equities" which contains 5 rental properties the mortgage on them is 1773$, the current rent with two out of the five houses rented is 1600$. and there's about 100k equity in them. Basically, what it comes down to me is I get a healthy return on my money as defined in a contract, and if not, i get a 50% stake in "vaunt equities" Pretty nervous/excited about the whole thing. Oh and there's a condo in my unit that is for rent... and it's for rent for 850. that makes me happy. Since I have no mortgage, if i decided to rent my condo and went back and lived with mommy i could make 850 a month... or i could buy a new house and use the 850 to offset mortgage costs.

and poker was fantastic today. that makes me happy. My day was absolutely amazing except for the fact that I didn't get to go see my friend Mike's band play. i was super excited to see them play. i love mike... and he's a talented little fucker too and I would have liked to be a groupie maybe throw him my unmentionables on stage. ;) supposedly it was videocamerad yes, i just made the word videocamera into a verb, and then conjugated it to the past participle. deal with it :p

kisses

Quotes. P.S. I'm lonely and sad today. Cry Cry. Sam is the best roommate ever though... and chile relleno burritos make me happy in my stomach.

The stupid neither forgive nor forget; the naive forgive and forget; the wise forgive but do not forget.- Thomas Szasz

Good judgments come from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment
-Harry Lepatner

idealism is what precedes experience; cynicism is what follows
David T Wolf

to endeavor to forget anyone is a certain way of thinking of nothing else
-Samuel Taylor Coleridge

our most important thoughts are those which contradict our emotions
-Paul Valery

Serious things cannot be understood without laughable things, nor opposites at all without opposites.
-Plato

It is a profitable thing, if one is wise, to seem foolish
-Aeschylus

Nothing that is worth knowing can be taught
-Oscar Wilde

Discovery consists of seeing what everybody has seen and thinking what nobody has thought
-Albert Von Szent-Gyorgyi

The art of being wise is the art of knowing what to overlook
-William James

A wise man's questions contains half the answer
-Gabirol

To want to forget something is to think of it
-French Proverb

A pessimist is a man that thinks all women are bad. An optimist is a man who hopes they are.
-Chauncey Mitchell Depew